Thursday May 28th

British family chomped on by wild apes as they toured the Rock of Gibraltar.

A family needed hospital treatment after a pack of Gibraltar apes savagely attacked them. Kim and Joe Castro were forced to protect their sons Sam, three, and six-year-old Jack as the animals pounced on them, biting and scratching with their sharp claws. The family said they were ignoring the barbary macaques, at the Rock of Gibraltar, before they launched the attack on steep steps near the top of the Rock.

The pressure is getting to Scottish singing sensation Susan Boyle, a big hit on Youtube, as she threatens to quit the Britain’s Got Talent show.

Susan Boyle has threatened to quit “Britain’s Got Talent” because she can’t take the pressure. So says “Talent” judge Piers Morgan, who’s had an up-close-and-personal look at the how all her worldwide acclaim has affected the Scottish singing sensation.

Pennsylvania woman who faked her and her daughter’s kidnapping arrested in Orlando FL.

A Pennsylvania mom found at Walt Disney World after claiming she and her 9-year-old daughter were abducted by two men and stuffed into a car trunk, allegedly conned a co-worker out of her identification to use in the hoax. Bonnie Sweeten used a co-worker’s driver’s license and presented it as her own when she bought an airline ticket and flew to Orlando, Fla. on Tuesday, Bucks County District Attorney Michelle Henry said, adding Sweeten also used the license to check into the Grand Floridian Hotel at Disney World.

Huge boobs holding her back says teenaged tennis player Simona Halep. Headed to hospital for reduction surgery.

Stunning Wimbledon hopeful Simona Halep wants a boob job to reduce the size of her massive mixed double DDs. Smasher Simona, 17, has been way out in front in junior internationals where her amazing form has won her an army of fans. But the 5ft 5ins sports star has told how she thinks her 34DD bust is holding her back.

The Queen gets royally dissed. Not invited to D-Day commemorations in France.

No member of the Royal family will attend next week’s official D-Day commemorations in France because they haven’t been invited, Buckingham Palace has said. The Palace was keen to stress there was “no anger and no frustration” over the arrangements. However, they did say it was “sad” that the commemoration had been “swallowed up by a row” – referring to reports that the Palace had been angered by the lack of invitation.

There’s a sasquatch way up in dem thar Oklahoma mountains so say some folks with a bigfoot research group.

Researchers believe that a footprint they discovered over the weekend in the Kiamichi Mountains of southeastern Oklahoma is that of the elusive creature Bigfoot. D.W. Lee, global director of the Mid-America Bigfoot Research Center, said the print was discovered about five miles into the woods. They were able to make a cast of the print, which measured 15 3/4 inches long and 5 inches wide.

Crime in Detroit surely isn’t going down but jail cells sit empty as arrests by the police drop like a rock.

Empty jail cells are normally something to celebrate, but Wayne County’s top law enforcement officials say the hundreds of vacant jail beds are not because of a drop in crime or more reasonable sentencing. Floors of the downtown Detroit jail are empty because police are arresting fewer people accused of those crimes. Altogether, three county jails that held about 2,500 prisoners a year ago now house 400 fewer inmates. Sheriff Warren Evans said police are so slow to respond to some calls that the crimes never get reported. Prosecutor Kym Worthy was more blunt: “We don’t tell the truth about crime,” she said.

Stabbings going through the roof in Australia a country that implemented a gun ban years ago in the name of “safety.”

Stabbing victims have lashed out at a growing knife culture after a surge of vicious attacks on our streets. The Herald Sun can reveal that the number of victims admitted to hospitals with serious injuries because of stabbings has soared in the past five years. A leading surgeon says the number of victims with major trauma at one hospital has more than doubled in that time, and the latest Victoria-wide statistics show more than 50 victims a month are taken to hospital with serious stabbing wounds.

School bus driver busted on child pornography charges. Looks like the employment screening process could use some beefing up.

A 41-year-old Plainfield school bus driver was ordered held without bond Wednesday after he was arrested for distribution of child pornography, the FBI announced Thursday. Mario Meschino is currently being held at the Metropolitan Correctional Center Thursday after he was formally charged with one count of distribution of child pornography, according to an FBI release.

Secret agent fights back against speed cameras posting signs all over town warning motorists they are about to get zapped.

Homemade signs popping up along roads in Potomac are the work of a mystery resident known as the “Potomac Secret Agent.” The bright red, campaign-style “Speed Camera Ahead!” are strategically placed near speed camera locations to warn drivers that they are about to pass a speed camera.

California high school prom queen is a gay guy.

Sergio Garcia stood in the gymnasium and told the senior class at Fairfax High School not to worry: If he was elected, he wouldn’t wear a dress. “I will be wearing a suit,” Garcia said, “but don’t be fooled, deep down inside, I am a queen!” Garcia, 18, spent most of his years at Fairfax openly gay and wanted to be part of the Los Angeles school’s prom court — but not as prom king. He felt that vying for prom queen would better suit his personality, so he decided to seek that crown, running against a handful of female classmates.

Man hits horse wandering on a darkened roadway, both are killed.

The driver of a Nissan Sentra was killed early Thursday morning when he struck a horse, which came through his windshield. George David Satterfield, 56, of Comer, was traveling north on Georgia Highway 129 near I-985 in Hall County when a horse wandered into the roadway sometime shortly before 6 a.m. Satterfield was pronounced dead at the scene of blunt-force trauma to the head and upper torso, according to Georgia State Patrol Trooper Mike Talton.

Couple claims $400,000 lotto prize one day before the expiration date would have rendered the ticket worthless.

Tomorrow would have been too late. But, luckily, news of an expiring $400,000 Powerball word got to a Cumberland County, Pa., couple in time – 50 weeks after she bought her ticket at Karns Foods, on Carlisle Pike in Mechanicsburg. “My husband . . . told me to check my shoebox of old tickets,” said Brenda Stover of New Cumberland. “I matched five-of-five numbers on one ticket, but I didn’t realize it was the one they were looking for.”

Massachusetts state representative Gloria Fox snuck murderer’s girlfriend into prison to visit him. The legislator lied to prison officials about her relationship with the woman.

State Rep. Gloria L. Fox is under state scrutiny for allegedly sneaking a murderer’s girlfriend – previously bagged for engaging in “sexual acts” with the killer con – into a state prison in Bridgewater, the Herald has learned. Using her State House-issued, all-access prison privileges, Fox, 67, visited convicted murderer Darrell Jones in the high-security segregation unit of the Old Colony Correctional Center with a woman the Roxbury Democrat claimed was her “best aide,” two prison sources told the Herald.

Judge says the identity theft company Lifelock’s fraud alert service is illegal.

In a decision that has privacy advocates and others scratching their heads, a federal judge has ruled that LifeLock has been breaking California law for years by placing fraud alerts on its customer’s credit profiles. The decision is a blow to the burgeoning identify-theft protection industry, and means that companies that experience data breaches may no longer be able to offer victims free subscriptions to such services — a standard damage-control tactic in recent years.

Bitter people will now be seen as having a mental illness? OK, I nominate all Daily Kos nutjobs right out of the chute.

You know them. I know them. And, increasingly, psychiatrists know them. People who feel they have been wronged by someone and are so bitter they can barely function other than to ruminate about their circumstances. This behavior is so common — and so deeply destructive — that some psychiatrists are urging it be identified as a mental illness under the name post-traumatic embitterment disorder. The behavior was discussed before an enthusiastic audience last week at a meeting of the American Psychiatric Assn. in San Francisco.

Quote of the day.

I think that the only reason Clarence Thomas is on the Court is because he is black. I don’t believe he could have won had he been white. And the reason is, I think it was a cynical ploy by President Bush.

-Joe Biden when he was a U.S. Senator

This entry was posted in J.A.R.G\'s \"Gotta Read\" News Of The Day.

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